Solo

Happy Thursday!

The past couple weeks have been full of a lot of internal reflection. A week or so two of my friends and their three girls boarded a plane and moved to Uganda, Africa to bring home to their daughter, Chloe

Insane but remarkable. 

Their first stop was in London and I couldn't help but think about my own inevitable move in 5 months to Kingston. Then my brain began going through how they must be feeling and how determined in their hearts they would have to be just to get on the plane. Never mind the fact that they paid for everything and this has been in the works for months. It must have taken everything within them to board that plane, leaving what was comfortable and known behind and embarking on a new path in Africa. 

I, then, began mirroring it to my own journey. I will be doing almost the same thing. I am leaving what is familiar for the unfamiliar in the pursuit of something greater. They'll be travelling farther than I and they have a child waiting their arrival in Uganda but at least they have each other which makes it easier. 

I will be boarding that plane alone and that terrifies me. 

I mean, I've boarded planes by myself before. I even travelled to the UK alone. But there's something about knowing that you will be boarding a plane by yourself to move to a place where no one knows you. Sure it's a clean slate where I can literally be whomever I want to be and recreate myself but I won't have the familiarity of friends nor the comforts of knowing that people who love me are in the UK. 

With that being said, I am still determined. I knew this move was going to be emotional and it's going to get worse before it gets better but it's worth it. At the end of it, I'll be able to look back and see how far I've come, enjoy what is going on in the present and look forward towards a bright future. In the meantime, I am going to cleave to the friendships and loved ones I have here and enjoy every moment. 

I'm opening the platform now! If you are already planning for uni in the fall, what type of hurdles are you currently trying to hop over? Just pop a comment down below. 

Also, don't forget to follow me on Twitter and Instagram to stay up to date on what's going on with me! 

Steven

Permitting Happiness

Happy Saturday!

Ah! The new year is finally here!

It's so crazy to think that by this time next year, I will be a Kingston student. It's insane. 

I have noticed that this process is far more emotional than I previously imagined. I always knew that I would be sad and have mixed feelings about leaving America but this is so much different than I thought. I know I've probably mentioned this before but it's becoming more and more apparent the more I continue forward.

 I think that's what this blog will focus on primarily: the emotional side of the uni process. Not only is it taxing on the mind with planning and getting things organised but it's taxing on the heart and the emotions. 

I'm going to tackle an issue that I've been thinking through and it's something that I had to come to terms with when I applied. 

When I first made the decision to apply to Kingston, I was so excited. I was nervous but extremely elated. I was finally doing something I always wanted to do. Since I was excited, I felt like I should tell my friends! I mean, they should be happy with me as well right? Well, when it came time to tell my friends, I couldn't bring myself to be happy around them. 

I felt guilty that I was happy about leaving. 

I felt guilty that I was okay with leaving my country. 

For a long time leading up to the day I sent in my application, I was torn between being joyful and guilty. Why should I feel happy about leaving? Why should I feel happy about leaving my friends and family?

When I thought about it, I realised that I had it all wrong. I was not happy about leaving, I was happy that I was following through on an endeavour that I felt was right for my life. 

So my advice to you, dear readers, is if you are feeling happy about applying abroad, permit yourself to feel happy. 

Carefully analyse your feelings and approach them from another perspective. 

This is your life and you should choose to live it as you choose. Other people do things for their lives that you probably wish they hadn't done so why shouldn't you? 

You've already decided that you want to explore another plateau of greatness abroad, so be joyful about it! It may sounds selfish but in all actuality it is! You have to do what you feel is right for you. If someone is not happy about it, assure them that it's okay that they're not happy with it and help them come to terms as much as you can but do not let it sway your decision. Think about the end game, if you have one in mind. Is this worth it? If your answer is yes, then let that spur you on. 

With that I leave you with a question, what has been the hardest part about applying to uni so far? 

Leave your answers in the comments as I would love to be right there with you!

As for me, I prepare to leave for Europe in 3 days!! I can't believe this is happening!! I'll be posting pictures from the trip as soon as I possibly can!

Wish me luck!

Steven S.